Discussion
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Comments
Based on what you have submitted, I can tell that you are way off track with this assignment. This paper is to be a review of the research literature related to your topic. You are writing it as if it is a report on the subject. Please review the guidelines in the "Apply" section of the learning guide again and redesign the paper. The topic sounds good, but there isn't any critical review presented in this draft. You don't include a complete list of references, so unfortunately I can't comment on the what you intend to review.
This draft is much better than the last because you are addressing research studies. Most of the dialog right now is a good cohesive discussion of findings, but need to be improved by adding your own critique of the studies. Also, go into more depth with the comparison and contrast of the research findings and methods used.
The final draft will need an abstract.
Right now you aren't reviewing enough studies in the paper, so more will need to be added to the discussion.
Format: The paper needs format improvement. The APA referencing format looks fairly good, although there are some minor mistakes on some of the in-text citations and on the reference list.